Being different in today’s society is an act of defiance and courage in itself. Together with that being a part of the LGBTQ community only makes it even more challenging. When you’re young and naive, your level of experience and age does not help you against all of the questions thrown your way. 

Setting society aside, your own family too can sometimes have challenges accepting and supporting you. Whether that is your mother or father or both. Every family is governed by a set of rules they follow, based on past traditions and experiences. It is both terrifying and unacceptable to change or med this way of living and being. 

Announcing your sexuality to your family is not only unsupportive but also frightening, especially when this surrounds you being gay or lesbian. 

This article focuses on some of the challenges faced when children express their sexuality and how parents can better support them.

Challenges faced when opening up about your sexuality : 

1. Conflict and arguments – It is natural for conflicts to arise when this topic is first put forward. Both parties want to stick to their own side of the argument which means that disagreements are common. 
2. Dominance of power – Being parents it is obvious for them to want to have the upper hand. Now that your child is more open to embracing your sexuality, this means parents are more likely to want to be in control of their lives. 
3. Withdrawal of love – In some cases, they may even withdraw or withhold their love. This means sparingly or completely emptily giving their love. They may even use manipulative tactics in order to love, which is unfulfilling and unfair.
4. Disapproval – Complete disapproval is also an option for parents. Upon hearing their child’s request they may turn to fully disapproving their choice, instead of hearing them even once.
5. Disowning from the family – At last, they may disown their child from their family due to the intense and heightened feelings of anger and shame they feel. This is often the last option but it does not mean that it is not possible.

How parents can better support their children : 

1. Be open to listening and understanding – One of the first ways to support your children is to be open to supporting them through the act of listening. If one does not listen, their parents carry an unfair attitude. When their child does listen they are showing their children that they care for them and are open to understanding their reasoning. 
2. Treat them as individuals with respect – Anger is a major emotion involved in this whole process. Anger of not being understood and the anger of disrespecting your family. Which is why it is important to remember to treat your children with the same love and respect they deserve as if they came to you before opening up about their sexuality. 
3. Be open to honest conversation – This situation requires open and honest communication from both sides of the coin. Along with active listening, the ability to respectfully converse with your child’s wants, needs and perspective is key to a healthy understanding between the two of you. This allows the situation to move forward positively.
4. Understand where your child is coming from – This is the 21st Century and along with the advancement of technology comes the advancement of ways of living and being. A person is allowed to choose their own path and pave their own way. They are not bound by the rules of society and knowing this is key to this whole journey of one’s child.
5. Give your children free will to live through their mistakes – Even if as parents we think we are right and know best, it is good to let our children make their own mistakes. For if we do not let them make their own choices, we are denying them of their right to live and that is unfair.

Opening up and understanding your own sexuality is a difficult and daunting process. It comes with a set of challenges, in which opening up to your family is the biggest one. Though scary, it is not impossible. I hope these tips help you if you are at a similar point in your journey.